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I love the moment at which I realize I actually fucked up. It's awkward, it's frustrating, it's embarrassing, but it's always such a great opportunity to learn and grow.

After writing the article “He keeps creeping into my life. What do you do when he does that?”, I shared it with the person concerned with an apology. I made a conscious effort to apologize for the wrong I had done to him, even if it was unintentional.

Hi NAME

You've inspired an article thanks to our email exchange about Elon Musk.

I apologize for asking for suggestions for improvements when I wasn't looking for suggestions for improvements. My insecure teenager creeped in without me noticing. When you wrote that "I believe you asked for suggestions", you triggered doubt and I went back to my first email... and you were right.

I understand that it was probably a frustrating and unnerving experience to receive emails from me with opposite messages.

I apologize for wasting your time with my insecurities, and I thank you for this opportunity for me to learn.

Love,

Noam

One of the most important lesson I learned about building healthy relations is to clean up after myself: if I say or do something wrong, I make up for my errors. It’s not personal and it’s not about being a “bad” person, but about taking responsibility for what I do.

This is NOT about becoming a monk: this is basic “spiritual hygiene”.

After I cook, I clean up after myself; after I take a shit, I clean up after myself; after I make a mistake, I fix what I did.

Take part in the game below to clean snot from your spiritual face.

GAME:

  • Find 3 places in which you have fucked up with your words or actions.
  • If you said something wrong, apologize for your words.
  • If you did something wrong, make up for your actions.

SELF REFLECTION:

  • After having cleaned up after yourself, what difference has it made…
  • … for the other person?
  • … for you?

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